Annie has pulled out all the stops to organize an STD awareness event at GCC. At first Jeff is uninterested, but that changes when he sees the dean's new secretary. Meanwhile, Troy tries to throw one of the event flyers into the trash can, but misses. Abed, however, makes the shot. Troy is concerned that Abed may be better at sports than he, so he challenges him to a game of basketball.

Troy loses to Abed in basketball while Pierce invites Jeff on a double date with him and his new girlfriend. She is an escort, but apparently not for him. Jeff doesn't want to do it, but then Pierce challenges him to find a date for the STD fair.

Dean Pelton chooses Annie to demonstrate how to put a condom on at the STD fair. Even though it's on a mannequin and not a real person, this makes her very upset.

Jeff goes through his contact list on his phone, trying to get a date for the STD fair. The women are all referred to on the list by descriptions, like "Car Wash Redhead". Not surprisingly, he's not having any success. Britta explains that he's not giving women identities, which is shallow. She also finds her own number listed under "Hot Blonde Spanish Class".

Annie asks Shirley and Britta to help her break into the dean's office to get the mannequin so she can practice putting a condom on it. She admits to never seeing a penis before, even though she's had sex.

Pierce meets Jeff outside the STD fair and reassures him that it's okay not to have a date. Embarrassed, Jeff picks up the dean's assistant and brings her to Pierce to show him that he is capable of getting a date. Pierce is joined by his girlfriend and the double date begins.

Pierce suggests that he and Jeff split up for some "hoo hah" with their dates, then meet back in the morning for breakfast and details. Jeff, of course, thinks this is a horrible idea. Meanwhile, Troy challenges Abed to an arm-wrestling match and loses.

Britta, Shirley, and Annie break into the dean's office and stare at the mannequin through a hole in the door until they're caught by security; Doreen tells Jeff that he needs to find a woman to converse with, as she does most of her time talking to her escort clients. Jeff doesn't believe her and decides to show his ditzy date his car instead. Realizing she can't converse with her date either, Doreen breaks up with Pierce unless he's willing to pay 200 dollars for the rest of the evening.

Dean Pelton is called into his office by security to deal with the break-in. A school counselor is brought to help everyone deal with saying the word "penis", but Annie is perfectly happy being uncomfortable with her sexuality. She stands up for her beliefs and storms out of the office.

Jeff and Sabrina are making out in his car when he discovers that she thinks he's a professor because he's at Greendale and he's old. Jeff realizes that he needs to start acting his age and leaves the car with her still in it.

Troy beats Abed in a race across the campus but it's clear that Abed let him win. The free condoms that were being given away at the STD fair turn out to be faulty when a group of guys makes leaky water balloons out of them. Dean Pelton asks Troy, as the best athlete at GCC, to run to his office to make an announcement before anyone starts using them. Troy admits that Abed is really the best athlete, and Abed is given the task instead.

Jeff admits to Pierce that he stopped making out with Sabrina but he doesn't know what's wrong with him. Pierce tells him that he's just maturing because as a man gets older, he needs more than just sex from a woman. He then asks Jeff for 200 dollars to finish his date with Doreen. Jeff then changes the "Hot Blonde Spanish Class" contact in his phone to "Britta".

Abed reads to Troy from his biology textbook until he falls asleep, but just as Abed is about to leave the library, Troy asks him for a glass of water.